Which Coaching Style is Best?
In the journey of personal development, “how to choose the ‘right’ coaching style?” is a popular question. However, it is not as clear-cut as you might think. Finely crafted combinations of approaches work best, those that are personalized according to a client’s needs. This is where higher-level coaching expertise and experience comes in. Today, I’m excited to share the six coaching styles that I offer in my practice.
1. Democratic Coaching Style
The democratic coaching style puts the client (that’s you!) in the driver’s seat. You explore and prioritize your values, short-term goals and long-term vision. You take a close look at habits, thought patterns, choices and other obstacles that might get in the way. You outline steps for change and manifestation. Where does the coach come in? The coach holds space, structure, support and accountability for this process. With sharply-directed questions, you learn to identify discrepancies in your thinking and cognitive thought distortions/patterns that interfere with transformation.
Benefits of Democratic Coaching:
Relationship to Self: When you identify the thoughts, patterns, habits and decisions that best support your goals, you boost self-awareness and options.
Friends and Family: As you make better decisions, you have more time and energy for the people closest to you. You become less reliant on others for happiness.
Work/Purpose: With more refined introspection, you become less enmeshed with people-pleasing, perfectionism, procrastination, and assumptions. You own your worth and care less about what others think of you. You stay focused on your goals, increased productivity, work-life balance and overall satisfaction.
2. Solutions-Oriented Coaching
Solutions-Oriented Coaching focuses on identifying and implementing practical, healthy solutions to current problems. This style is action-driven, emphasizing immediate steps and strategies to overcome obstacles and get unstuck. This style is especially helpful when feeling overwhelmed, confused or immobilized with an important decision or course of action.
Benefits of Solutions-Oriented Coaching:
Relationship to Self: You gain clarity on your challenges and how to address them effectively, boosting confidence and motivation.
Friends and Family: With improved problem-solving skills, you open up space for healthier conversations, less stress and more harmonious relationships.
Work: With an ability to tackle work-related issues efficiently, you access increased productivity and job satisfaction. If stuck in the wrong job or career, you discover options, resources and the right path forward.
3. Transformational Coaching
Transformational Coaching creates profound, lasting change through exploration of deep-seated beliefs, approaches and values. By taking a look at the origin of your worldview and thought patterns, you are ready to determine whether or not they still serve you. You shift perspectives with great intentionality. You come up with resources, a plan and structure to support continuous growth.
Benefits of Transformational Coaching:
Relationship to Self: As you understand and reshape one or more core beliefs, you experience greater self-acceptance, authenticity and creativity.
Friends and Family: With the surfacing of your truer self, you create more meaningful connections and greater opportunities for intimacy. You model self-acceptance and invite others to be more genuine as well.
Work: A deeper connection to self helps you be more innovative, resourceful and resilient. Letting go of limiting beliefs, especially imposter syndrome, opens up options and opportunities.
4. Holistic Coaching
Holistic Coaching takes a comprehensive view of your life, integrating mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual parts. You achieve balance and harmony when you find ways to take care of your full self.
Benefits of Holistic Coaching:
Relationship to Self: When you nurture and align all parts of yourself, you tap into equilibrium. At times, people emphasize one area of their life to the detriment of the whole, leading to burnout or gaps in wellness. With Holistic Coaching, you go after what you want with balance.
Friends and Family: A more harmonious lifestyle leads to healthier and supportive relationships. When you take time to honor and address all parts of your life, you have the ability to stay connected to those you love in a consistent, trusted way.
Work: Integrating a holistic perspective improves your overall well-being which positively influences your work performance. With greater clarity, you choose work goals that benefit you; consequently, you feel better about your job and show up ready to take on challenges.
5. Shadow Work Coaching
Shadow Work Coaching delves into the parts of yourself that you don’t like, suppress or ignore. Society, including social media, institutions, and family members, encourage us to fit a certain mold, at the expense of our authentic selves. This style of coaching explores and integrates the "shadow" aspects of your personality, leading to greater personal integration and self-love. When you make peace with all of your “parts” and work in partnership with them, you are in greater control of your thoughts, feelings and actions. You experience less “Shadow Takeovers”, times of impulsivity that lead you to feel out of control and, believe me, that is an excellent thing!
Benefits of Shadow Work Coaching:
Relationship to Self: This style of coaching allows you to connect with and accept your hidden aspects, leading to a more complete self. This does not mean that you allow your “parts” to do anything they want. For instance, you don’t allow a part of you that wants to steal to start robbing banks! However, you love that part enough to strive to meet some of its needs in ways that won’t harm you.
Friends and Family: By understanding and addressing your shadow aspects, you improve your interactions and reduce conflicts in your relationships. You also bring out special parts of yourself that you once suppressed due to societal judgment and pressure. This brings about a whole new world of freedom, opportunity and creativity.
Work: Increased self-awareness and confidence leads to better decision-making and leadership skills, enhancing your professional interactions.
6. The Tools Coaching
The Tools Coaching approach provides you with specific techniques and strategies, designed by psychotherapist Phil Stutz, to take on life’s challenges. It helps you tap into an energy that helps you supersede procrastination, victim mentality, grief, insecurity, conflict, self-sabotage, rumination and more. To learn more about The Tools, watch Johan Hill’s documentary, Stutz, or read The Tools Book and Coming Alive, written by Barry Michels and Phil Stutz. The Tools provide you with concrete and powerful ways to get out of your head and navigate complex feelings, mindsets and situations more masterfully.
Benefits of The Tools Coaching:
Relationship to Self: You gain practical skills for self-management and stress reduction, launching you from a place of being stuck into a life-affirmingl world of “forward motion”.
Friends and Family: You notice, label and manage your inertia, lack of boundaries, dependency, and unhealthy cognitive thought patterns, leading to more gratifying connections.
Work: Equipped with practical strategies and greater self control, you enhance your relationships and reputability with colleagues. You tap into problem-solving abilities, contributing to career enjoyment and, perhaps, advancement.
The Power of Coaching
No matter which coaching style resonates with you, the benefits of working with a personal development life coach extend far beyond your sessions. A highly impactful life coach meets you where you are, offering carefully blended coaching techniques that leave you empowered.
As a passionate life coach, I help you create the life you want through:
developing a proactive mindset to address hurdles with hope and resilience;
gaining a deeper understanding of yourself in order to gain more control over your feelings, thoughts and actions;
transforming your core self to enrich every aspect of your life;
committing to a balanced lifestyle and overall health and happiness;
integrating all parts of yourself and diving into a more fulfilled and authentic life experience.
accessing a toolbox of strategies to navigate life’s ups and downs with greater acceptance, energy and joy.
If not now, when? Get in touch to embark on an adventure of personal growth toward your fullest potential.
Kathleen Young, Founder of Aurora Lights Coaching, is a personal development and academic coach. She loves helping clients tap into their strengths and find a purposeful energy that moves them forward.